Tell me about irrelevancy?
That’s irrelevant.
Tell me about growth?
I’m in it.
Tell me about… 9707 9th Pl SW, APT 101, Seattle, WA, 98106?
That’s in my memory.
Tell me how many cigarettes you smoked on the front balcony?
Enough that there are still Newport butts littering the hedge bushes.
Tell me about the King County Public Housing employees that came around every morning to pick up those butts?
I’d see them coming out the window, and feel a guilty shame, and when they left, I’d run out there and smoke my Newport Box 100’s with relief.
Tell me about quitting smoking?
One of the hardest things I ever did. Couldn’t brush my teeth without smoking a cig first.
Tell me about addiction?
I’m not a counselor, I don’t know the science of it.
But you know it physically?
You could say we’re acquainted.
Tell me about procrastination?
I wish I’d learned earlier in my life not to guilt myself for it.
Why’s that?
It’s a big part of what makes me, me.
Tell me about… binging.
Depends on what is being binged and who is doing the binging.
Tell me why you do the binging?
To make the emptiness go away.
Tell me why you feel empty?
I grew up traumatized.
Tell me how you deal with that?
I pray. I write and pray.
Tell me about Allah SWT?
He has been too kind to me. Without Him, I am nothing.
Tell me about setting boundaries with non-Muslim friends?
If I don’t do it, they’ll lead to my downfall.
Tell me about… being judged?
Look, they’ve been doing it long enough, I might as well stick to my guns.
Tell me about handling guns?
I couldn’t, really. But plenty of people in the woods of America could.
Tell me about southern heritage?
That’s code for we hate niggers.
Tell me about code switching?
I would, lakiin af somali is not my strong suit.
Tell me about blackness as a social construct?
I believe in that idea more than this notion of gender as a social construct.
Tell me about burning buildings?
This country is one.
Tell me about being on the outside looking in?
If the inside is a burning building, I’d rather be outside.
Tell me about faith?
It’s the only thing that holds me together.
Tell me about disappointing white people?
Well, it stands to reason that, people who are surprised I’m literate don’t have expectations that weren’t meant to be broken.
Tell me about anger?
I don’t know how I’m not more angry than I am.
Tell me about turning that anger within?
It’s worse than if I turn it without.
Tell me about giving up anger?
I’d like to, but the way my genetic makeup is set up…
Tell me about Kevin Hart?
Bro survived a car crash in a muscle car with no seat belt and came back a few weeks later.
What was he driving?
A newer muscle car.
As if to say?
What didn’t take me out the first time, can’t take me out a second.
Is that not tempting fate?
People who believe in this world don’t believe in fate.
Is that not judgmental?
No, just theological.
Tell me about faith?
I’m tired of repeating myself.
Tell me about repeating yourself?
I’m getting upset with you, Voice.
You’re getting upset with yourself?
I’m upset with my situation.
Tell me about overreacting?
It’s easier to do that and be perceived a heretic, a conservative, a whatever, than it is to keep getting trampled on.
Tell me about building community?
I’m not gonna survive this thing with my Emaan intact if I don’t double down on everything that makes me, me.
Tell me about yourself?
I feel like you already know everything there is to know.
Tell me about time.
It moves slower when I write.
Tell me why you write?
I think I do, with every sentence I write.
Tell me about salvation?
I hope and pray I have a good accounting on Judgement Day.
Tell me about fraternizing with people who don’t believe?
They can only pull me from my beliefs, because I know they will most likely never believe.
Tell me about saving yourself?
It involves putting up walls and not being afraid to step on people’s fake feelings.
What do you mean by that?
I mean people will pretend to be offended or upset with me, but as Allah says in the Quran, they’ll never be happy with me until I become like them.
So they’ll keep pulling on your threads until you become like them?
Until I have not an ounce of belief left in me, its their natural inclination.
Why?
It’s how Allah made them.
Isn’t us vs them thinking dangerous?
What’s dangerous is not protecting my faith.
Why?
Because I grew up in the progressive west and I saw the very end of that rabbit hole.
Where does it lead?
To destruction, demise, death on the inside.
What does it mean for you to stand strong in your beliefs?
It means not dying on my knees.
What is this life?
Temporary.
What is the next life?
Extemporaneous.
Explain?
It has no end. No limit.
What would it mean for you to enter Heaven?
It would mean that everything I’ve ever felt of pain in this life would pale in comparison.
To the joy?
To the unbridled joy of Paradise.
And who could you see there?
All my family, loved ones, the people who came before me.
Who else?
All the people that came after me, too. My descendants, if Allah willed it.
Who else?
The Prophet, PBUH, and his righteous companions, and all the Prophets before him.
Do you think the ride is worth the price of admission?
It’s certainly better than the alternative.
Explain?
A cheap ticket today will be an expensive ride tomorrow. And an expensive ticket today…
Will be a worthwhile ride tomorrow.
Right.
So where does writing come into all this?
Well, it’s been a secret (obvious) dream of mine to write something that’ll get me into heaven.
How so?
Something that changes people’s lives, helps them see their purpose, brings them to (or back to) Islam.
Something of beneficial knowledge that you can leave behind and will forever keep getting you good Ajr?
Yes, hassanaat.